Funny Quotes Part 132

• When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did–in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car. - BOB MONKHOUSE

• I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. - ELAYNE BOOSLER

• Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back. - Wilde OSCAR WILDE

• Some people are like clouds. When they go away, it's a brighter day. - Anonymous

• I don't need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. - Anonymous

• I changed my password everywhere to 'incorrect.' That way when I forget it, it always reminds me, 'Your password is incorrect. - Anonymous

• Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly. - Anonymous

• I know the voices in my head aren't real..... but sometimes their ideas are just absolutely awesome! - Anonymous